Degree

When i think about all the things i need to do to accomplish my dreams it stresses me out. First of all i have a part-time job, im a full time college student and am a mother of a little boy that is constantly on the go. It is deff a lot to take care of. One of my goals, or dreams in my life is to be a great mom, i planned my life a little differently. I wanted to graduate highschool, start college, graduate college become a nurse with a masters degree, Find a wonderful man, get married, have  a nice house be established and than start having babies...haha but life doesnt happen the way you like. Im pretty sure everyone has figured that out by now. I actually got pregnant at 17, am currently not married, but with my boyfriend/ father of my baby, in my first semester of college, and raising my son. Being a mom is one of the best jobs ive ever had in my life. I love my son so much he is my world, and he is my motivation to do and be better! He motivates me to go to work and school everyday. I honestly dont know what i would do without him in my life. My life is better with him in it. Its crazy because once you become pregnant well for me anyway i start thinking so differently i care about others and animals more, im a more understanding person, i like to stand up for myself and people around me, i try to help out everyone, but one of the things ive never had to go through in now my 19 years of life is loosing someone close to me. There was this girl that i went to elementry, middle, high school with, we did cosmetology together we were friends and today she died in a car accident. Ive never ever had to deal with a loss of a family memeber friend nothing. It has really hit home for me that you cant take your life and other people for granted. You can be here one second and the next gone...its actually really scary to think that. She was so young, beautiful, had a life to live, grow up, have kids, get married and now its all gone. The first thing that i thought about when i heard was oh my god her poor parents and brother they are all going home tonight and she is never coming home. It just breaks my heart. I have no words. Nothing. Im absolutely speechless. I cant believe that such a young life was taken from us. I cant grasp the fact that she is gone. Im at a loss for words. I pray for her family and i hope that they are doing okay. I could never imagine loosing my son. I could never imagine loosing your child saying goodbye to them and never being able to hug, kiss, or see them again. when i got home from work tonight i went in my sons room and just stared a him sleeping. I just wanted to know he was there and breathing i never want him to grow up and drive, or leave home hes my baby. This is honestly one of the hardest things im still in the denial stage. I Cannot believe this for one second it is crazy. I like how i started talking about school and switched it around so much to were now im talking about something totally different. I just cant seem to get her out of my head, and grasp on the fact that she is gone, i just cant comprehend. Honestly all i can think bout is the graduation song...AS we go on we remember all the times we had together and as our lives change from whatever we will still be friends forever... R.I.P Brenn You are Truly missed.